Today’s the day where the tens column of my life flips over another digit.

Today’s the day I turn 30.

I’ve put off being creative too long and it’s been driving me batty. I’m missing a crucial part of who I am when I’m not creating things for myself. The work is fine and dandy, but I’ve got to reorient myself and tap into the stories and fudamentals of my own desires just as much as the commercial end of things or the expectations of others.

This livejournal is going to be part of that. I’m going to post more sketches, experiments and progress on my pet projects instead of just squirreling things away and never letting it see the light of day. When I was working on Makeshift Miracle I had a real sense of commitment to finishing those pages week in and week out, good or bad. After it ended I felt some relief, but the momentum it built was lost at the same time.

It’s time to rebuild that desire and make it happen. This isn’t a mid-life crisis or a depression-laced post lamenting “Woe is me.”. It’s not a woeful situation. I’ve always had the ability to do it. I’ve denied it out of fear, laziness and distraction.

Starting next week I’m going to start doing Life Drawing again at the school at least one evening per week as consistently as possible. I’m also going to begin a new web comic. Something simple. I’ve been letting myself get intimidated and it’s stalled the process. Each month that rolled by after Makeshift ended I would worry about living up to it and doing something that much better, both in art and story. Even when I knew in my head that the act of creating was the most important thing, I still psyched myself out. No more.

This is a little contract to myself made public to help make it stick.

More art, more stories, more arms stretched out to feel the air whirl around me.

Welcome to 30, Zub. Don’t waste it.

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