Zubby Newsletter – February 18, 2001

Walking home today, I was strangely calm. There was almost no traffic on the roads and the silence made things feel distant. A light snowfall and crisp but nice weather helped create the perfect atmosphere to think. I’ve got several things on my mind; it’s scary and exciting at the same time. Let me explain…

I fought with my roommate pretty intensely earlier this week. I was pretty much ready to move out March 1st; to hell with the damage deposit. Luckily, cooler heads prevailed and after we worked things out, I decided I’d be staying until the lease expires on April 1st. That will give me enough time to find a nice spot to live, and make for a kick ass summer in my own pad.

It hadn’t dawned on me before, but this will be the first place that’s truly just mine. I’ve always had roommates since I left home and finally stretching out my wings is pretty cool stuff. Even if it’s gonna be small and have no furniture…dammit, it’s all mine!

School is quite good. The night course will be wrapped up at the end of the month and it’ll be nice having the extra cash flow. The day course is also doing well and the students have really started to come out of their shells. It’s fun, but they’re working hard, too. If I can keep up this energy level, they’ll be the best class yet.

And then…the kicker.

After the last newsletter, one tiny paragraph raised a lot of interest in everyone. I got several e-mails from people asking me about this girl I had met that I described as “cute”. Well, two weeks later things are progressing well and I’m starting to get quite nervous.

She’s really amazing and I want this to work out (seems obvious, I know). We talk, laugh and get along very well. Silly talks, serious talks, common hobbies and interests. She’s spontaneous, confident, intelligent and straightforward.

“What’s the problem?” you say.

“Pounce!” you cry.

I want to. I want to ask her out. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’ll work. Call it cockiness, but I’ve always had a vibe that tells me if I’m going to get together with someone. It’s like a little *ping* in the back of my head that proves we’re compatible. Even when circumstances seem to go against the *ping*, the *ping* always ends up being right in the end. It’s a mixed blessing, really.

With this girl, it’s there…I feel the *ping* and now I’ve just got to fight past the fear of rejection and ask her out. It may sound easy because we get along and the *ping* agrees, but there’s always a first time that it could be wrong. It’s the nagging doubts that always accompany these things, no matter how much I try to avoid it.

It’s the chase, and you have to enjoy the moment while you’re in it. I’m on the chase, and I decide when to pounce. Too soon, and it may not be ready… too late, and it could slip away.

When… where… and how do I ask…

It’s the excitement of the chase…
closing in… stay tuned… wish me luck…

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