Clean Outside

I have a marked habit of doing a lot of cleaning when I’m really stressed. It’s an odd habit because it takes time away from other tasks, but also puts my mind a bit more at ease.

I think it’s the concept of completing little things around me. Tackling the little skirmishes that can be “beaten” all at once, unlike the big wars that life throws at us. It’s a small sense of accomplishment when I’m having trouble dealing with major problems. Even if there’s some emotional issue, ambiguous strain or insurmountable problem I’m dealing with, I can win the fight against laundry, dusty carpets and dirty dishes. It’s an odd defensive measure to help bolster me against larger issues. I know a lot of people who let their hygene and environment devolve to reflect their mood when they have major issues. When I finish these cleaning sprees there’s an odd contrast between my immaculate home and my messed up little brain. It’s kind of hard to describe.

My apartment is currently almost spotless. Wish me luck.

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