Zubby Newsletter – August 8, 2000

When I think about it, my hands shake a bit…

Okay, I’m getting ahead of myself. I should set the scene.

The week went well. I’ve been working my butt off on finishing the final draft of the new course curriculum. It’s pretty much done now. I handed in a CD-Rom with all the hand outs, examples and lessons on it. That’ll make September and beyond a breeze and inadvertently makes a nice portfolio piece if I want to teach animation anywhere else.

The weekend was equally nice. We had Monday off, so I decided to be adventurous and went with a crew to go play paintball.

If you’ve never played paintball before, I’ll set the scene. You pay money to sweat like insane and be scared like crazy that someone’s going to shoot you. Getting hit with a paintball is like getting drilled with a crab apple by a bully in elementary school. I’ve got 8 “crab apple” welts that are making me limp today. The two in my left knee are particularly sore.

The best part of the day was being holed up in a hollowed out bus with 4 other maniacs and being assaulted outside by the other 13 in our group. It was like the Alamo on caffeine. The sound of pinging metal and splatter of paint was everywhere. When I got nailed in the side of the head, I saw stars. Of course, the bus crew lost, but we fought valiantly.

I would die in two minutes flat during a real war. Just running in overalls with a semi-light gun exhausted me within half an hour. If I had full gear and a real gun, my heart would explode long before any enemy got to me. I’m pretty thankful I lead such a relaxed life normally.

But contrary to what you’re thinking, my hands aren’t shaking because of paintball…

I went to grab the C-Train today and go home about 45 minutes ago. The C-Train’s a subway-type train that’s above ground. The day went quick and I was relieved to be heading home. I was sore from paintball and the sun was beating down.

At that moment, a man collapsed and fell into the tunnel.

He wasn’t unconscious…he seemed calm actually. I think he wanted to die there as the train came in. That scared me the most.

It was one of those eerie moments when everything slows down and nothing seems real. Like it’s all happening somewhere else and you’re watching it on TV. Except that now, I was involved. Three guys and I jumped down into the tunnel to push him back onto the platform. I knew what I was doing, but it didn’t feel like reality. I could feel my paintball wounds pulsing with my heart, but that was it.

Now that I think about it, I’m shocked how many people just watched. A couple people ran to the platform edge and helped us get him up, but most just stood in silence while it all happened. We all got out just as the train blasted the horn and missed us by about 20 seconds. A minute later, I was sitting on the train and riding home like nothing had happened.

No drama, no death or Hollywood gore; Just a weird thing that happened today. I’m more scared now that it’s over then when it was actually happening. Why do people think suicide is some solution? Why are people so docile?

Yeesh. Gotta go. Anyways, all’s good now. Take care everybody.

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